This four-week workout program is designed by RKC Pat Flynn, kettlebell expert and founder of Chronicles of Strength:

 

I have this theory that any exercise program will improve in direct proportion to the number of things you can keep out of it that needn’t be there. That’s to say the secret to any good exercise program is simplicity. And so, these four weeks of workouts - which, I should mention, are dedicated in whole to getting you maximally lean and super muscly - will focus on one thing mostly, and that’s metabolic conditioning - specifically, metcon via kettlebell complex training.

 

These exercises are to be performed successively and uninterruptedly - that is, with little to no rest in between. And it is to this end that you can expect that each workout will be short, intense, and somewhat upsetting - like a proper licking from the old man’s belt.

 

And how are you to know when you’re done? How many licks does it take, you ask? Well, when you reach the point where you think you can’t possibly do another rep - wen you start to bellow the pathetic and unmanly yells of a flogged schoolboy - when you reach this point, well, I think that means that you are pretty much done.

 

To learn more about Pat's approach to kettlebell complex training, read his article "How to Get Maximally Lean and Super Muscly with Pat Flynn."

 

Week 1, Day 1: The Great Destroyer (Video Below)

 

The Great Destroyer has become something of an illustrious public menace, and rightfully so. This monstrosity is the manifestation of my experiments with the dark arts. To wit: a relentless reorganizing and repairing of the most sinister exercises to conjure up what I believe to be the damnedest and most demonic kettlebell complex ever seen!

 

What to do:

  • 10 x Double Kettlebell Swing 
  • 10 x Double Kettlebell Snatch
  • 10 x Double Kettlebell Front Squat
  • 10 x Double Kettlebell Clean and Press
  • 10 x Push Up

 

Perform 3 to 5 rounds of the Great Destroyer with as little rest as needed between sets.

Recommended operating weights: 2 x 16kg or 20kg for males and 2 x 8kg or 12kg for females

 

I will devise another like this, one day. That is, when I’m relieved of my duties on this earthly realm and finally able take up a more permanent and fulfilling residence in the far back corners of Hell. There, I imagine I will be free to express myself without scrutiny or restriction.